Wednesday, March 16, 2005

A Man's Guide to Feminine Lingo - Friends

At some point or the other, all you men out there must have heard a woman say, "Let's just be friends, okay?" That one line from the woman you desire must have done to your ego what a thousand shrapnel would feel like going through a ripe wound. The disastrous effect is amplified if the concerned woman had been showing signs of interest in you, playing with your mind, kept you on your toes, and always wondering "what's next?"

So what do women exactly mean when they use the deadly 'f' word? To understand the implications of the usage of this word, let's start with what one would normally define for a friend - A person with whom you are comfortable being around, with whom you can talk to your heart's content, and be yourself. Now, making a contradiction of the sorts is the fact that in an ideal male-female relationship, being friends becomes the arch pillar for feelings to grow, trust to build, and sets stage for finally giving in to one another. All the elements that make friendship tick can be found in a romantic relationship. Essentially, friendship is the lowest form a romantic relationship.

However, when a woman wants to be just 'friends' with you, what she essentially means is that the closest you could get to her is to be a puppet in her hands and entertain her when she is bored. Women use the word 'friend' to mean something like a barricade around them. A barricade to keep you out, yet hold you close enough to be 'controlled.' What's more, if you agree to be her 'friend', you are stomping upon your already-crushed-ego and altering it in to something beyond recognition.

In reality, a man and a woman can never be 'just friends.' At most, what they share could be called an acquaintance - a kind of contact which would be highly superficial. As soon as you are sharing something more intimate, you are stepping in to the R zone. Women may tell you that they had no 'feelings' for you and did things that accidentally led you on. What they essentially mean is that they were trying you out and you haven't quiet qualified to appeal to their tastes.

What I hate most about the 'f' word is the fact that women use it as an intimacy-limiter. You can get close to them only as much as they want you to. Why should friendship have any boundaries? Why can't we men just be free spirits? If we are comfortable with a woman, why should the word 'friendship' dictate what you can do and what you can't? Why should it dictate how close you can get? Why should this fucking 'f' word axe all your chances of finding a potential companion, a soul mate?

Having said that, listen up, men. The next time a woman says she wants to be just 'friends' with you, don't waste your time on her. Save what's left of your ego and walk out in dignity. If you are convinced with what you have just read, congratulations! You are one more step closer to understanding confused bundles of concocted emotions (CBCE) called women. Cheers!

PS: Women reading this, please do not mistake me to be a male chauvinist. I look up to you and you are, indeed, what make life worth living for us men.